“Blogging101” day 4, is asking me to write a post to a specific person/people. I would love for everyone to learn about Jesus so they too can experience His amazing Grace, but since I have a daughter struggling with especially social anxiety as I do too, I’m gonna give that a shot. So who do I want to read this post: Anyone who struggles or has kid/s who struggles with anxiety as well as psychologists and psychotherapists and psychiatrists.
The story begins, and I’m only telling you this because if this is the first time you read my blog, this may be good to know… with my soon-to-be 9 year old daughter who has since Japanese kindergarten’s 2nd year, age 4, struggled with fear caused by not-so-understanding teachers and she has entirely disregarded learning Japanese language (which is pretty tough when you hold a Japanese passport!). We had no choice but to give her an international school education.
However, the fear followed her and though it seemed to get much much better during her 5th year, things went downhill from age 6 again. During her 2nd grade it all went south and we placed her in counseling where she was treated for mainly separation anxiety and general anxiety. It worked half way but not really. Her psychotherapist told us she was okay… really, she wasn’t but it’s hard to argue with an educated psychotherapist, and we were told that perhaps mom (that’s me) would need some help instead as “my anxiety channeled into my daughter”. I can’t say it isn’t true… but telling us that our girl was fine, was definitely not.
Out of counseling and for a few months – and a tough summer you can read about if you scroll down my posts if you wish – she seemed to be okay. And then, it all began all over with the tears, the fears, the pain, the… her fear of teachers are truly wrecking havoc. Due to her track record of learning math we were encouraged by the school to have her tested for dyscalculia and we did as well as adding the aspect of anxiety. The evaluation came back and shook us both up pretty bad. Several anxieties mounting up to a close-to depression.
She is starting to see the psychologist from next week (there is a severe lack of psychologists as well as psychiatrists here in Tokyo!) who will do his best to knock the tip off the iceberg and avoid the medication recommended. The psychologist want to avoid it because there are no psychiatrists here whom he trusts to handle a case like hers, I don’t want it because of various cultural issues I suppose and my husband also wants to try to see if we can get her through this without it. Albeit, if it can’t be done, then… somehow we will have to figure out how to get her on the medication.
Dealing with the diagnosed social anxiety in my child is just plain sad. So so sad. She is in a school system and systems are systems as much as they can stretch, it will inevitably be a system. I must learn how to deal with this, but admittedly it’s hard to know where to begin… I go from positive to negative day in and day out. It does get better so I’m not in the cave all the time.
Meanwhile I have found a website which has been useful so far: Kids helpline
Thanks for reading… if you are a child psychologist – would you please find your way to Tokyo?? We are in dire need here…