Today is the day that my dad was moved from the hospital to the hospice.
What I’m feeling is a little hard to describe as it’s a mix of feelings playing on all the keys of my emotional piano; Relieved that my dad will be in a place that’s right for him. Happy that my dad is happy about the move and feels at peace with it. Sad that my dad is in such condition that a hospice is needed. Thankful for the existence of hospice care. Concerned if my dad will not get his wish and come home one last time – and if he does, how will he emotionally respond to it. Happy that my dad and those of us who love him will have experienced and educated people around us to talk to about this ordeal. Sad, happy, sad, happy…
My dad had an emotional day all day. He said goodbye to his nurses at the hospital – with hugs and kisses and tears… had a transport to the hospice (at that time unknowing of what to expect)… was introduced to his doctor there and nurse – and asked some hard questions about life and death that left him in tears… then left to his room where he began calling everyone he knew telling them where he was and how nice it is… then we came and enjoyed the afternoon there… we left around dinner time and my dad was close to his “old self” meaning joking and at times lashing out. Well… I have a feeling that if the pain medication will work, he will sleep quite well tonight.
And so will I.