Yesterday and the past weeks I have been battling loneliness. It’s a real dark tunnel in case you haven’t been there. Loneliness is an ugly feeling the enemy lures us into and it makes us feel trapped. The reasons for the loneliness can be many and if you read my previous post you can easily tell how the enemy was pushing every button I had!!
– But “Frozen” IS still a good movie. Just want to point that out…
In the early hours of this morning the Lord Blessed me greatly with a coffee morning chat alone with Him. When we hold nothing back, God is ready to take it all in. While speaking and thinking out all those thoughts and feelings that were creeping up on me and those already solidly planted in my head, the coffee cup warmed my hands and the blanket warmed my body. Then I asked God to speak to me. Bring me wisdom as a mom and wife, a child of God and teach me the lesson I needed to learn from all this dark loneliness. If I want God to change my heart into His likeness, I must allow Him and ask Him to. I can only learn to the extend I am willing to be taught.
He brought me to several scripture verses. Some had a very intimate and personal ring to it and dealt with specific circumstances and matters. But the main point was that it’s a lonely fight to battle the enemy. It’s something others can’t participate in. Demons are everywhere and we must guard our hearts.
Then God took me to the how’s of the battle: To confront the emptiness of the lonely feeling and give thanks. Not to thank Him for the circumstances but to give thanks that He allowed this to happen and to open up the eyes of my heart to see, what He wanted to show me. In 2 Corinthians 4:17 Paul says
For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.
I have always heard about two ways to fight satan: Be thankful and quote scripture. As Jesus was tempted (alone I might add) in the desert He quoted scripture every time satan tried to tempt. So can we. But if the temptation is too tempting and we give in, how do we get out of it? By being thankful for it? Well… sort of. What God showed me was that being thankful is to have a grateful heart, but also to trust that God has a plan for it and He is willing and able to show His purpose for the circumstance. But it’s tempting to get stuck on various matters of the heart, isn’t it. But then God… flipped the page and spoke from 2 Corinthians 4:6:
For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ.
Now fighting the demon may be a lonely battle, but what was I thinking when focusing so much on my own loneliness that it covered the light of Christ, who placed His light in my heart for me to shine?… Moment of repentance… And just when I could spell “I’m sorry Lord” in calligraphy letters, God flipped His Word and spoke again from Isaiah 30:20:
The Lord will make you go through hard times, but he himself will be there to teach you, and you will not have to search for him any more.
I just LOVE when God speaks truth into me. And I especially love it when He is being straight and direct and loving, yet firm fully knowing that my heart is once again cracked wide open and more than willing to shine His light and bury my own.
Peace be with you all – though we fight a lonely battle we are not and never again will be, alone! Hang on to that truth!