From stone to unknown.


I know it’s a sentimental babble but just bear with me…

My mom’s urn burial place and tombstone was discontinued (2 years ago, which I was reminded of today). Meaning the stone has been removed. I live far away – 10.000 km – so perhaps didn’t think much of it back then, but now that we are making travel plans to visit Denmark, I wanted to go “visit her”. But there is no place to go anymore.

My mom has been gone for 12 years and she never wanted us to care much about it, so discontinuing is perfectly in line with her wishes. Still, It just feels strange that there is no tomb stone with her name on it anymore and I’m only 41 years old. Somehow I expected this to happen when I turned 60 or 70… 5 years ago I took some pictures of it and today I’m glad I did! 

In Denmark you buy a burial place for a specified time, usually with cremations it’s a 10 year time frame. After that you can choose to extend it or not. It’s not due to a lack of space, but perhaps to prevent unattended deteriorating grave sites. My family has moved away from the area and basically never visited and of course I’m not there to visit either… I just get a bit sentimental thinking about it because though she lives on in memories, it’s nice to have a place to go visit. And for some reason I just didn’t imagine that my mom’s resting place would be gone this soon. I don’t disagree with the decision as it is in accordance with my mom’s own wishes. But usually it’s the children who decides to discontinue their parents resting place when they themselves get old… I don’t feel that old yet.

This morning during my quiet time with the Lord I asked Him what to do… I want to take my daughter to my mom’s burial site and visually show her “this is where grandma lies”. But I can’t. My mom’s original wish was to be placed in the unknown peoples burial place. I know she wasn’t, but it occurred to me that since the urn has by now perished and the stone has been removed, she too has gone – into “unknown people”. It would be a lie to tell my daughter that my mom lies in the unknown peoples burial site, but it could perhaps serve as a place to go and explain to my daughter that when our names on this earth is no more, then in an earthly perspective we become “unknowns”, but that’s okay – because the Lord knows our names. Of course, I then bump into the constant struggle of my mom never accepting Jesus as Lord and Savior…

I would love to hear what you think about this and trust me; Any suggestions would be welcomed with appreciation. Thank you.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s